This Rakhi..For V.V. and Vishal Ji..

2nd August, hardly 2 weeks from now, is this amazing day of Rakshabandhan. Its amazing because the year that has gone by has given me few amazing people, who I need to not only thank but demand their care and adoration for my entire lifetime.

My Guide and 'Pillar' of Support: I don't know when this bond became so strong. He has patiently listened to me crib and complain. He has laughed on the saddest of my jokes. He has pulled my leg like no other and not even once did I mind him doing that (I did mind it once "what are you doing from there?" ;). I have fought with him with all the rights (not talking to him/ignoring him for hours together). I trust him. I have traveled with him. He has protected me and has shown me the right path. He has guided me. He is someone I can't keep a secret from (not anymore!). I love to do little things for him. I can be so so happy when he is around, we laugh like mad people, no matter how stressed we all are.

I thank you, V.V., for EVERYTHING!


The Elders (the shade of care): He has made sure his care is reflected through her. I don't know when these two became family. I have become a kid again, since she has been around. We laugh as if no one is watching. I can't wait to tell her EVERYTHING! And can't stand if she is upset. She understands me and I know it through her, time and again that they care for me beyond imagination. She has let me commit my errors, to let me learn on my own but has never failed to provide a shoulder to lean on, a source of strength to depend upon. They are my shade of care in this hot, sunny, humid land of Chennai. I take rights on her and bug her to the extent of her wishing to kill me. But she adores me, i can sense it. They have become an inseparable part of my life.

I have to thank vishal ji, and not mention her separately (since it is rakhi and I know she is already cribbing about how her birthday gift is still pending and how her name is not mentioned here even if this note vividly talks about her ;) ; Vishal Ji, I will always remember you saying "ye bada bhaai hai na" ; though I am not sure if you remember saying it or not. I cant thank God enough for both of you.

So.. Dear VV and Vishal Ji, be prepared with your wrists on this 2nd of August, because with just one thread I am going to make it official that I can irritate/bug both of you for the rest of my life.

P.S. Inder Bhaai and Shravan, you guys are next!

Scribbling My Heart Out..

Today when I'm sitting alone at this coffee shop, reflecting on my todays, I realize that one needs to do this every day. Sitting at a quiet place (ok this place is not quiet) and spending time with oneself. I know it sounds philosophical and I am not spending time with myself right now. I'm rather waiting for someone. But that's not the point. The point is I'm not at peace with myself. I'm not liking my own company. I'm looking for distractions, almost intoxicated with worldly things. The thing that matters the most 'inner peace', is somehow missing today.
May be because life is moving on a jet speed and I'm not able to catch up. Thrill, excitement, plans, dreams and what not. I'm also trying to guard myself and protect myself from being hurt again. But I guess that's not possible. I can never fight against the 'unknown' - the future. I wouldn't know what are the weapons or tactics this future will use to win against me. Surprisingly I look at my future as an enemy. A very big signal of insecurity. Not right, but at least I know what exactly I have to be working on.
Being scared of the future, makes your present weak. Am I scared? No! But am I prepared? Big No!! Anyways, all said and done, its nice to have the control of my life in my hands. My choices, my wins, my losses, my lessons, my rewards.. And then someone to share all this with, who would love to listen, who respects the intellectual in me, adores the child in me, loves the woman in me, understands the human in me. I'm thankful to all the people who have helped me heal, recover and be back to life in 'full form'. The next post will have a detailed memoir of how each person around me has contributed to my 'new life'.
To conclude, I'd just say.... I am not sure if I'd win all my battles of the future but I am sure as hell gonna try. I'm armed with confidence, fresh outlook, determination, self-belief, and trust of people who mean the world to me.
I don't believe in "big talks", at least not anymore. If I'm able to spend each day with pride and sleep each night with peace, I know that I'm livin' it up! And right now, I'm not just livin' it up, I'm livin' it up 'Queen' style..