If I Write Today..

If I write today,

I might end up drenching the paper,
With water,
Warm with anger,
Salty with disappointment.

If I write today,

I might end up saying too much,
Things that might not be rosy or kind.

If I write today,

I'll realize I have failed.
I'll realize, after all it is all an illusion.

If I write today,

I'll know it is only black and white,
There is no red or pink.

If I write today,

I might not stop,
There is so much..
It is so low.

If I write today,

I would face,
The things buried,
The things uncovered, unsaid.

If I write today,

I would suffer more.
Because I'll know for sure.
I'll realize it all.

It is not rosy or kind.
It is not red or pink.

It is shallow water with,
Sharp rocks underneath.

It is a lot of thorns,
And the flowers have dried.

It is a lot of allegations.
And the heart has cried.

Like I said,
It is only black and white.

No matter what I think,
It is after all,
Only Black and White.



Face to Face with Reality,
The Pink Orchid

Of Un-Faking

Being your real self might appear to be hurting you and others around you but it is the best way to deal with your life. You have committed mistakes? Well, who hasn't? Does that mean you kill yourself or remain on a never ending guilt trip? Nay!

If you choose to be wrong then have the courage to accept. And your wrongs had seemed right to you at one point of time, no matter which godforsaken logic you put behind it. The point is that time has gone and you have moved on.

Now the question arises if you think your real self might not be acceptable, should you cover yourself in a garb of fakeness? Hell no! I know what you are worried about. The people. The people you love. The people you care about. Well, if they don't know the real you then their being with you is temporary. A flash of your reality and poof! They'll be gone.

To quote the cliche' "Don't hold them with the fake you. Treasure the ones who love you for the real you"
Another category of people who would pretend of accepting the real you but will prick you at the drop of a hat. I have only one message if you are dealing with someone like that --- "Guard your heart, Lady!"

Really,

The Pink Orchid

P.S. I have said enough.

Not A Song, Not A Dream..

I would not want to learn a song,
which I cant sing to you.
Not a word,
which hasn't fallen on your ears.
I would not want to miss out on,
telling you everyday,
that 'I Love You'.

I would not have a dream,
which you aren't a part of.
Not a destination where,
you cannot accompany me.
I would not want to miss out on,
seeing myself in your eyes,
everyday.

I would not have an emotion,
that remains unexpressed,
or a desire,
that you aren't aware of,
I would not want to miss out on,
knowing how much you love me,
everyday.

I would not want to stay,
when you are about to leave,
I would not want to be alive,
when you would not survive,
I would not want to walk,
on a bed of thorns,
when you are not around anymore.

I do not want to imagine,
a day without you,
when I would not know,
who to wait for anymore,
cook for,
and look pretty for.

I would not know,
who wants to look into,
my baby eyes,
or have a full laugh,
when I mix,
Bihari English in Tamil.

I would not know,
who would listen to me,
when I endlessly talk,
without making any sense,
who would value my opinion,
who would appreciate,
when I act mature.

Sweetheart,
with you not around,
I would not know,
how to breathe.

Don't you see,
I can go on and on,
but I would not really know,
how I would really feel,
when you are not around.

But I know this for sure,
that there is,
not a song, humming,
not a dream, shining,
not a destination, waiting,
not a smile, glittering,
not a hope, calming
not a ray of light, twinkling
when you are not around.

You must be wondering, why such thoughts? Well, I am already missing you bad and I had to see this video on youtube (embed at the end of this post) to exactly know how intensely I feel connected to you and how indispensable you have become. I am not able to write more because these are very emotional days for me when my past, present and future are about to unite, when I am about to become one with my dreams and all that I have imagined about love.

I want you to know that when I finally have you now to love and to hold till death does us apart, life doesn't seem tough anymore.

Forever Yours
The Pink Orchid